Old Etonians William and Harry will have received a begging letter from the college provost Sir Nicholas Coleridge asking them to help pay for a new sports complex. The royals, along with other former classmates, parents and friends of Eton, are being asked to make a financial gift to the college. Fingers crossed the boys are more receptive than one Old Etonian who wails: 'We are getting increasingly irritated by Nicholas's quests for money - not least because Eton is not giving any concessions re the VAT but passing it all on to parents.'

Zut alors! A diplomatic spat has broken out over the decision to ask French president Emmanuel Macron to speak from Parliament's Royal Gallery during next month's State Visit - not the more historic Westminster Hall. My mole whispers the French wanted the latter as that's where Charles de Gaulle addressed both Houses in 1960. That and the fact that the Royal Gallery is famous for two giant frescoes of...the battles of Waterloo and Trafalgar. 'Tant pis', Emmanuel!

Downton Abbey star Phyllis Logan, pictured, recalls weeping with fellow cast members Lesley Nicol (Mrs Patmore) and Sophie McShera (Daisy) after the end of the final series of the soap. 'I remember standing by the make-up truck to get my wig on and we three were stood sobbing into each other's necks for about 20 minutes. And then Jim Carter (butler Carson) made a speech and started breaking up - and that's not Jim at all - and so that set everybody off.' Creator Julian Fellowes was no doubt blubbing all the way to the bank.

John Cleese, revealing the hit Hollywood role that got away, says: 'I really am sad about [1988's] Dirty Rotten Scoundrels. I was offered the role... but my second marriage [to late US model Barbara Trentham] was in a mess. I thought, I can't go off and make a movie, I've got to go back and decide whether I'm married or not.' Thrice-divorced Cleese, who later split from Trentham in 1990, ruefully adds: 'It took me about a week... and by that time Michael Caine had got it!'

Grayson Perry, mourning Alan Yentob in The Spectator, remembers his 'endearing/infuriating' habit of incessant name-dropping and hanging out with celebrities: 'I once arrived early at some big arts event and immediately encountered Alan. We chatted and then he wandered off only to return ten minutes later. "Couldn't you find anyone more famous to hang out with?" I asked. "No," he said.'

Ireland football manager Jack Charlton wangled an audience with Pope John Paul when the team were in Rome for Italia 90. 'Jack wasn't a Catholic,' recalls team player Ray Houghton. 'He fell asleep. When he woke up, the Pope was giving a blessing to everyone in general - and Jack thought it was for him and started waving back!'